I thought that i had a pretty good grasp on the whole gym experience; i’ve joined many gyms over the years and I feel like I shouldn’t be surprised that I am only just learning the following:
It’s not just about actually going to the gym: I first signed up to get fitter. End of story. I felt like the muffin top was getting larger and thus unacceptable, and it was my intention to go for a run a few times a week, attend the group classes often and get rid of the flab. The reality is that I’ve been drawn into the whole culture of it; I’m invested in my results and that has spilt over to the things that I eat and my sleep pattern, good footwear and being hydrated. And protein. I’m currently obsessed with whether or not I’m getting the correct amount of protein for the exercises that I’m doing!
You just have to forget about looking sexy or cute: I didn’t sign up to the gym to attract anyone whilst there, but it’s hard to not be a little self-conscious when you’re huffing and puffing with sweat dripping down your bright red face and you just know that your entire back (and thighs and arse and feet) is one big sweat patch. In order to get myself to my best, I know that I have to look my worst. This truly is irony at its best. Though, having said that, if you still look cute at the end of the workout, you really know that you haven’t been working hard enough.
Communal changing rooms are in fact the worst thing in the world: People will be naked. A lot. There will always be someone in the changing rooms completely nude. It’s a fact. I’m a put-my-undies-on-under-the-towel kinda gal, so I was mortified when, after my first BodyStep (step aerobics) class, I was faced with two 50+ year old ladies stood talking and gesticulating wildly completely in the buff. They stood talking like that for a good 15 minutes. I’m sure this says much more about me than it does about people being naked, but hey ho, it’s still the worst thing in the world.
You will probably sweat more after your gym session that you do actually working out: My gym provides free hairdryer and straightener use as well as free irons to tidy your clothes. That can get pretty warm…have you ever been in the same room as an army of women blasting heat onto their hair whilst simultaneously trying not to elbow each other in the face? It’s hilarious…but you might want a towel to mop your face…
No matter how much gym kit you own, everything that you need will be in the wash when you want it: It’s a fact. I’m told that after a while you will just end up wearing the same kit all week…I’m not at that stage yet, thank god! However, I do tend to panic wash things the night before I want them when I realise that both pairs of leggings and tops are still dirty.
Gyms are cliquey: Imagine the scene; two girls instagramming every moment of their delicate workout, the hot guy in the tight t-shirt checking out everyone including himself, the girl in the crop top adjusting the fold of her yoga pants every two minutes, the huge man with no neck grunting and groaning as he lifts an amount no mere mortal should be able to lift…it’s worse than school…
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